“YOUR RELATIONSHIP AND YOU”

BY MRS  ISITOKHAE

​

Relationship can be defined as a connection or association of being related either through kinship i.e by blood, marriage, romantic or sexual involvement.

                 Here, we will be talking about the last definition which has to do with ‘romance’ and ‘sex’. I know when the word ‘romance’ is heard of or talked about, the first thing that comes to mind is oh! This person is talking about kissing, touching, hugging and what have you. But no! Not to be bamboozled or confused, lets get a clear explanation of what romance actually means. Romance is an intimate relationship , i.e close, private and affectionate character between two persons or a person to a thing like humans to flowers.

                 Are you aware that flowers can be romanced? In fact, anything  you  tend to look unto with eyes of admiration, is actually romantic to you at that point and believe it or yes, you last involved or engaged yourself in a romance. Now lets talk about “LOVE” 

                 Love is an intense feeling of affection and care towards another person. A deep or abiding likeness for something or someone. Euphemistically, some persons see love as a sexual desire or sexual activity for satisfaction which is supposed to be the last thing that should come to mind when talking about love and relationship . now, questions that should come to mind when talking about love and relationship or before taking about it are; at what age and who should I enter into relationship with?

                 The first question which has to do with age is sacrosanct. This is because, relationship itself needs emotional stability else it will tumble and crumble. Yes! It is said in the western world that at 18years of age, you bear full responsibility of yourself and actions. But considering this part of the world (Nigeria) at least 20years of age should be better but, 18 is good. This is because, at 18, females specifically may or must have completely attained the stage of puberty. Note: a male without any constant source of livelihood should not venture into a relationship else he may or will not be able to handle the excesses that come with a relationship. Of course, your spouse has to be taken proper care of. And also at age 18, the state of the mind must have advanced to a state of being able to handle issues emotionally.

                 On the second question, which has to do with knowing why you should be in a relationship  at all. Hmmm! This is the heartbeat of this topic. It is said that ‘When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable’. It will interest you to know that people enter into relationship; for so many reasons. Some for sexual satisfaction and activities which is about 80% and this may sound funny that some find themselves In a relationship of “Bet of Pay back”. And I tell you only about 20% enter into a relationship for utmost purpose and dream actualization. Don’t  put sex first in your relationship. My father in the Lord, APOSTLE PHILEMON EHIMARK said and I quote “WHEN THE MOTIVE OF AN ISSUE IS CORRUPT, THE OUTCOME CAN NEVER BE CORRECT”. Who says love is blind? When it begins, it will be obvious that love has more than two eyes. Who says you can’t stay without sex? Is sex everything about…………

                 TO BE CONTINUED…….